Written on September 11, 2006 6:52 PM
Today has been a day of seemingly incessant “I want” whines from Benny. From the moment he blinked open his eyes, it has been relentless. “I want to play trains,” “I want Bob the Builder,” “I want juice,” “I want Engine that Could,” “I want banana,” “I want my big doggie,” “I want Illma” (don’t ask me. I have no idea what that means, either)
I know I should just suck this up. After all, a lifetime of “I wants” surely awaits me. When Benny no longer wants trains, he’ll want Harry Potter books read to him on a loop. When HP doesn’t do it for him anymore, he’ll plague me with requests for bikes or skateboards. When puberty hits, he’ll simply ask for money or, if he’s feeling more verbal, perhaps an Ipod.
But, in spite of this inevitability, I think a mama needs an “I want” whine of her own, now and again.
So, here goes:
“I want to leave the playground quietly and serenely, without having to bribe, cajole, threaten, and plead with a three year old,”
“I want to get riotously drunk and not have to worry about a three year old jumping on my aching head in the morning,”
“I want to be left in peace when I’m in the bathroom without a three year old pounding on the door, opening it with bang, and grabbing the magazine I was happily reading out of my hands,”
“I want to wear a t-shirt for an entire day without getting any of the following encrusted on it: snot, mud, paint, yogurt, tears, jam, peanut butter.”
“I want to cook a bagel, spread it with cream cheese or peanut butter, and have a three year old eat the whole thing and not decide, two bites in, he wants cereal instead.”
“I want to just quickly check my emails without a three year old pulling at my leg asking if he can see the Thomas the Tank Engine website for the millionth time”
“I want an ‘I’m too busy New Yorker’ to pick up the front of the stroller when I’m precariously bumping it down the stairs, complete with a nearly 40lb three year old, to the subway”
“I want one morning, just one morning, where a three year old does not say ‘I want’ once”
and while I’m at it…
“I want a holiday in Hawaii, a big margarita, a new winter coat (preferably down-filled), a new laptop, and Maggie Gylenhaal to become my new best friend (she seems so cool and I know she lives in my neighborhood.”
Okay, I’m done. It’s out of my system!
