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  1. #1
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    NSW, Australia
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    Pregnant and Feeling a Bit Down

    Has anyone else felt a bit down at some point or another during their pregnancy/ies?

    Don't misunderstand, I am completely overjoyed and excited about the upcoming birth of my baby, as is my husband. I don't think I am in any way a candidate for pre or post natal depression, it's just that for the last couple of weeks I've felt a bit blah and down. A bit weepy. I've felt a bit clingy towards my husband too, and worried about him.

    Of course, there are lots of physical reasons which I think contribute to feeling this way: I'm not sleeping well, my feet are swollen and sore, I'm at the point where I feel really cumbersome and heavy and it has been sooo hot and humid where I live. My brain feels incredibly alive and active, and therefore bored, because my body is so easily tired.

    I've finished work (it's school holidays here and I'm a teacher) and I have plenty of ideas of things I want to do but everything is such an...effort. I feel like I can't do anything. I go out to the shops, or to see a friend and when I get home I feel like I need a rest!

    On top of this I feel guilty every time I have a negative thought because I'm so happy to be pregnant! I feel like I shouldn't be ungrateful. (I know how silly this sounds)

    Here's how I'd like you to respond: "Pudding, this is just something many pregnant women go through, it's completely natural and will pass. Of course you're allowed to complain a bit! Here are some great ideas for things you can do to entertain yourself for the next few weeks...." ;-)

    My gut feeling is that this is all very normal and I think I just need a bit of empathy! Thanks for letting me type all that out, I already feel a bit better!

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  3. #2
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    May 2004
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    Pudding - This is completely normal and I'm sure most mothers here have gone through similar things. First of all, never underestimate the effect of a bad night's sleep! And then there are all the other uncomfortable things...

    At times my issues were more hormone-related. I was bitchy and stressed-out. And the last four weeks were hell. Allergies, congestion, (no sleep), etc.

    I don't have any advice apart from, "Don't beat yourself up about it." Vent when and where you can! Like here!

  4. #3
    Senior Member
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    Apr 2005
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    State College, PA
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    It's all very hormone related. Ever feel like this before or during your period, only this is amplified? Once the baby comes, be prepared to have those PMS feelings of madness and sappy crying intermittently at 10 minute intervals for days.

    For example: You're hot. Post partum hormonal hot flash. You strip down to your undies and turn on the ceiling fan. Suddenly, WHY DOES THAT FAN HAVE TO MAKE THAT AWFUL CLICKING NOISE?? You get up and yank the chain, swearing you'll never buy another ceiling fan again as you grit your teeth. Is it too much to ask for to have a quiet fan? Afterall, ceiling fan manufacturers should know how sensitive a new mom can be! A new mom...I AM a new mom! Oh, look at how beautiful she is! Commence crying in sheer joy at her beauty. Until you hear that fan clicking again. Fun, huh?

    You're going to be OK. Accept that now and then you are allowed to feel a little blue and uncertain. No one will fault you for that and you have this board to sound off to if no one else wants to listen!

  5. #4
    Senior Member
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    Sep 2004
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    Quote Originally Posted by fairgreenlady
    For example: You're hot. Post partum hormonal hot flash. You strip down to your undies and turn on the ceiling fan. Suddenly, WHY DOES THAT FAN HAVE TO MAKE THAT AWFUL CLICKING NOISE?? You get up and yank the chain, swearing you'll never buy another ceiling fan again as you grit your teeth. Is it too much to ask for to have a quiet fan? Afterall, ceiling fan manufacturers should know how sensitive a new mom can be! A new mom...I AM a new mom! Oh, look at how beautiful she is! Commence crying in sheer joy at her beauty. Until you hear that fan clicking again. Fun, huh?

    :-)

    Pudding, how far along are you? You might be subconsciously "mourning" the end of the pregnancy already. I know that even though I was so happy to have my babies to look at, after they were born I missed feeling them in me all the time.

  6. #5
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    appalachia
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    normal normal normal. not that that makes it any easier, but you are in good company.

    in addition to everything already mentioned, i was also conflicted about giving up my days of freedom and independence. and as excited as i was for big life changes and to finally meet my daughter, there was some major insecurity about my ability to be a good mom mixed up in there, too. plus i was so damn tired all the time, it was hard not to feel down. i never got that burst of energy everyone talks about around the secong trimester. and my morning-noon-and-night sickness was present the entire pregancy. i couldn't wait to be not-pregnant!

    so, treat yourself to books and movies and fun pasttimes that you might not get to enjoy for a little while. pudding time.

  7. #6
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    Apr 2004
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    Celery City, MI
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    Hey, I have cried recently over the correct pronunciation of a kind of cheese! (I'm at 27 weeks right now.)

    It is true that there are a lot of weird ups and downs and that it's all totally normal.

    Reading is a great suggestion. At least that way it's a bit of a mental escape, but you can still lie down or doze off while doing it. Just don't read any of those pregnancy books that fill your head with 9 million things to worry about!

  8. #7
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    NSW, Australia
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    Quote Originally Posted by sjkmaurice
    Pudding, how far along are you? You might be subconsciously "mourning" the end of the pregnancy already. I know that even though I was so happy to have my babies to look at, after they were born I missed feeling them in me all the time.
    I'm 35 and 1/2 weeks and what you're saying makes sense.

    Thank you everyone for such sublime advice and for the empathy and laughs (just what I needed).

    I've been thinking reading would be a good idea, too. I might make a trip to the library tomorrow.

    I've just come back from spending the night visiting friends. We ate beautiful food, spent all evening in the pool (that was so, so fantastic) and talked late into the night. I feel revived.

    My husband drove and carried my bag and I think I also feel a bit better because I've started to accept that I do need some help and do need to slow down and rely on him and other people a bit more at this point. I was getting anxious about "keeping up" and letting that go has given me some peace.

  9. #8
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    Jan 2005
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    Braintree, Massachusetts
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    Normal!

    I'm almost 30 weeks with my second and am JUST now starting to enjoy this pregnancy.

    Well, the discomfort is getting to me and it's frustrating not being able to get around as quick as I used to. . .

    After I had my son I got the baby blues for a while--nothing too too major and thank God I had my mom, my husband, my MIL and my aunt for help. I remember he'd cry and I'd just lie there not wanting to get him -- I cry when I think of that now, but it happens (FU Tom Cruise!).

    This pregnancy I've been extra cranky and bitchy and I want so much to enjoy it but the stress of working and taking care of a 2 yr old can get to me. I think a lot of it is anxiety about having two and how I'll juggle everything.

  10. #9
    Junior Member
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    May 2005
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    Miami, FL
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    4
    I'm 20.5 weeks and am an emotional mess- back and forth, giddy happy and depressed. I'm clingy too with my husband but he also sets me off rather easily too.

    My guess is it's normal, that's what I tell myself at least. ANd when I'm down I eat chocolate :)

  11. #10
    Senior Member
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    Aug 2004
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    NSW, Australia
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    Quote Originally Posted by mutantsupermodel
    ANd when I'm down I eat chocolate :)
    Ahhhh... good advice for any situation.


 
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