Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 22
  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Missouri, The Show Me State
    Posts
    179

    having.."The Talk"

    I need to have "The Talk" with my son, who is almost 12.. he pretty much understands that sperm meets egg... but I want to talk about the things that really matter, like waiting til ready, like giving yourself permission and not making sex ugly or guilt ridden, treating women and yourself with respect, etc etc.. so much to cover!

    Can anyone recommend any good books or anything to help me? I started an outline to help me keep track of things I want to cover, but I didn't think it would be this soon! He tells me how he has a girlfriend, and I blew it off and then I saw them holding hands at his football game! (they are in 6th grade).

    I don't want to pull out the Ol' Our Bodies, Our Selves charts and pictures but he is curious about how babies are born and I think he deserves to know....he is my only son and I have never done this before... any advice?

  2. # ADS

  3. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    brooklyn
    Posts
    600
    I just want to applaud you for doing it... many parents don't, which seems crazy to me. Other than that, I have no advice because I haven't been in your shoes. Good luck! :-)

  4. #3
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    16
    Go to your local Planned Parenthood and ask for any and all brochures! Good luck and how great that you are being proactive about your son learning about sex from you and not on the school bus!

  5. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    282
    BTDT....also mom of a 12 yo boy. Our chat was last year when obvious he and his friends were discussing "things". Not keen on him learning wacky(IMHO) attitudes/ideas from friends' parents. ICK!!!

    Be honest with your son re: your values and ideas re: sexuality. Reinforce that "others' may have different values, and that's ok, but these are our values and why...." Sperm-> egg is the easy part.

    Don't forget contraception. It's information all sexually responsible teens need whether sexually active or practicing abstinance. Information is not a license to practice.

    We made certain our boy understood that sex is not a tool, a weapon, etc. And to choose his partners carefully as any could be the Mother of his Children, and every intercourse encounter could result in pregnancy or disease. That really impacted him!

    Our son didn't ask re:specific acts, so you may want to hold off on karma sutra. Kids usually only ask what they're capable of processing. When he uses slang terms( and he will), take that as a cue to revisit his topical knowledge and correct as necessary.

    Good luck! Pm me if you need specifics.

  6. #5
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    3
    Also, make sure that your body language doesn't say ‘this talk is freaking me out!' or ‘sex is bad bad bad' because he will sense that. My mom was very open and honest which made 'the talk' seem somewhat normal and not awkward. And we can still talk freely about most things related to sex today.

    My dad & step-mom are the complete opposite (beaver cleaver family). I don’t think they even knew that I got ‘the talk’ from my mom, who I only saw on the weekends, and they were very okay with that. And to this day we have never talked about anything sexual (or even very personal for that matter).

  7. #6
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    438
    Try this link:
    http://www.amazon.com/Boys-Girls-Bod...e=UTF8&s=books

    I'm very happy for you, and gladthat you're having this talk with your son! It's important for him to hear these things from you and not from strangers.

  8. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    106
    It's so great that you're doing this...not enough parents do! When I was in college there were several people there who believed some pretty dangerous lies and myths (examples: birth control pills prevent STDs, a girl can't get pregnant the first time she has sex, etc). I couldn't believe they were that age and still believed those things. Their families never really talked about sex, so they just picked up whatever they could along the way.

  9. #8
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Boston
    Posts
    676
    My mom just gave me a book something with the words "our bodies" in it I think.

    Anyway, that was that.

    Good luck, I commend it, clearly you are more courageous than my mother (and she was dealing with a girl.)

    Who knows what she did with my brother???

  10. #9
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Rochester, NY
    Posts
    822
    Oh, the talk!! My older son is turning 12 on Dec. 1st. He and my younger son are 7 yrs. apart, so he has been getting information from us gradually since he was 6/7 yrs. old, starting w/ the "where do babies come from" questions. He has just started going through puberty, pimples, b.o., broadening shoulders, genital enlargement.
    He laughs hysterically over any mention of "balls" and is still a goofball, but he's also becoming a bit more responsible.
    Having a littleboy/young man is quite a trip to be sure!
    Anyway, he understands how babies are made, we've given him info when he hears a sexual term he doesn't understand. He'll just give us a goofy smile, say "hmm", and nod in response. Nothing is off-limits for him to ask us.
    I've thrown in things here and there about respecting other people's bodies, about not playing head games w/ people of any sex, and respecting himself enough to take the time to get to know someone he really likes before taking things further.
    Last week we were out and about, and saw a jeep w/ it's tire mounted on the back w/ a cover over it that said "Tire condom". So he asked me what a condom was. LOL!
    those conversations can spring up in the oddest of places!

  11. #10
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    brooklyn
    Posts
    600
    Sewlittletime, you sound like an awesome mom. :-)


 
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast

Remove Ads

Ads

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Similar Threads

  1. When a ""friend" owes you money...
    By louisa in forum Freestyle
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 03-03-2020, 12:29 PM
  2. Worldwide Release \"Felt Cuisine\" Hand Made Prete
    By FeltCuisine in forum Girls Gone Crafty
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 07-21-2007, 09:11 AM
  3. "Happy Hooker" - new Stitch -n- Bitch crochet book
    By CraftinFool in forum Book Worms
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 10-02-2006, 04:46 PM
  4. "CRAFTY CULTURE" Chicago panel discussion on "
    By audreypillow in forum Girls Gone Crafty
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 10-15-2005, 05:20 PM
  5. "girls" vs. "guys"
    By case_case in forum Freestyle
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 02-03-2005, 02:47 PM

Search tags for this page

having the talk with my son

Click on a term to search for related topics.