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  1. #1
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004

    Why/How Did You Choose Your Current Love/Lust ?

    Being Valentine's weekend and the nature of some of the recent threads, I thought it would be interesting to post what makes our current love/lust object desirable.

    Mr. White Wedding has always expected me to be more than Just His Pretty Minx. He likes that I'm so independent and with him because I choose to be, not because I "need" to be. He is not threatened by my other interests, friends, or career. He encourages me to be involved in things I love. He is not surprised when I fix plumbing or send him naughty emails at work. It's just part of the package. Oh, he's also pretty to look at.

    And he has yet to prove stupid enough to write and produce a crappy zombie movie AND put my name in it..on the web.

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  3. #2
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    NE California

    The lust of an older man

    I'm almost 36 and am in the midst (hopefully the beginning!) of coming into my own sexual power and expression. I am a cooking, sewing, gardening, creative special education teacher and mama of a newly-9 year -old boy, live independently in my own little cottage in the boonies of NE California, and am currently involved in a passionate long distance relationship.

    HE is....almost 60(!). When I met him, I truly guessed he was in his early 40s. He lives far away, though, in Santa Barbara, and is a painter by art and trade and also surfs almost every day. We met at a party up here in October, where we as soon as we introduced ourselves, we moved to a sofa and talked for 3 hours non stop. What began as a passionate, crazy fling during one of his painting trips has turned into something unique and interesting and real. I visited him 2 months later in December and next weekend we will meet in the Bay Area for a long weekend. We talk on the phone several times a week and share our lives that way. I don't know where we are creating our future to lead us, but it's so interesting! I cried the last time we were together in bed, because for the first time in like 10 years, I found true holistic intimacy with someone - in such an unlikely circumstance. I have questions for us to deal with during this upcoming visit, like....what are we doing? What are the expectations and boundaries we want to have with one another?

    Anyone else out there dating an older man?

    By the crafty way, I'm bringing my sewing machine next weekend to the coast! I am reclaiming my seamstress skills as true art. I have some ReVisions and Christine Jonson patterns to work on. I am just beginning to sew clothes for myself again after 9 years since my son's birth...about time!!!!! So my painter LOVAH (as Carrie from Sex in the City would say) will be making paintings of the rocks and ocean and hills and I will be making clothes. And lots of other things!

    Thanks for raising this issue, bessiemae! I haven't posted before, but you really opened the door for me.

    Happy Valentine's Day!


  4. #3
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    May 2004
    I married my husband because, as cliche as it sounds, he accepts me for who I am. We are vastly different in many ways; he's die hard republican and I'm..well I don't like any of the major political parties (we have very interesting discussions!), he's more "country" and I'm more like Dharma and he is probably a little more religious than I. But we both have the same idea of what makes a marriage work, how to raise kids, same taste in cars (JEEPS!!), we are both very outdoorsy and like to get creative and make things ourselves. He's even one hell of a photographer.

    I loved how he threw out everything that he normally looked for in a woman and gave me a chance. I felt like giving him a chance (nice change from the brooding artist asshole from before) because he was not ashamed of who he was and didn't try to impress me.

    We met when we were both living in Germany, but because their marriage laws have thicker red tape than Watergate, we hauled it up to Denmark (the "Las Vegas" of Europe for marriages) to a cute little town and got married by a danish justice of the peace. Now we are excited about our little one on the way!

  5. #4
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Eureka, California, USA
    Actually, I grabbed my "hippie poet" after he and my sis broke up. That was over 30 years ago and he's been my best friend, lover, co-worker, fellow artist, and husband ever since. (During those years we raised 5 kids, and went from hippies to homesteaders to Christian missionaries. Now we're pretty much both. Eccentric artists and travellers, and still Christian missionaries.)

  6. #5
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    N.C. Pennsylvania
    My husband and I met at my former job. I was an assistant manager and he was hired for a manager position in another location. It was my job to help train him. In two weeks we managed to fall helplessly in love. I was very afraid at first as I was divorced with 3 kids and he had never been married and has no kids. I have to say that the first year was quite challenging at times but worth it nonetheless. We've been together for 4 years now and I'm actually looking forward to having another child. (never, ever thought I'd say that!!).


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